I’m pretty sure people want me to just disappear.
I don’t need to pinpoint the countless places on your body just to tell you they’re worth looking at forever—worth more than I’d have to see the city lights from up the tower, or the view of the stars at night while I’m sitting alone on an empty forest without no one to hold on to. The moles on your forehead, your eyeglasses with a little crack on the left, the distance between your fingers and the depth of your collar bones, how could you miss such a topography of perfection? I don’t need to state how many curves and lines and hills and molds of shapes your body contains, let alone make you realize that you are a water cascading down to a fall, and despite everything stormy and unbelievable, your being stays calm and all—because you are, at one glance, the only man I’ve ever looked at for so long and it does not disgust me. I could look at your artless expression forever.
Each day I’m looking for a thousand reasons to stay afloat, the pills and razors and ropes all readied and set up for one last good use, hoping every day is a sunny weather so when I die I don’t feel the drama of my life surrounding the house, but you always give me that one kind of reason I never wanted to let go of. “Breakfast?" almost seems so unnoticeable, but for every word you give every time I wake up on mornings give me also the luxury to see more to life, to see the good parts that I haven’t seen for a very long time. Dare I say that I don’t eat breakfasts, not in my whole life, but when it’s you who is always offering a day out… I always seem to change my mind so instantly.
I don’t always fall in love, but when I did and it’s with you, it’s almost as if I’m always falling in love, every second, every hour, every day. Do you even realize how effortlessly you make me fall for you? You don’t even need to smile… But that’s a plus.
Nagsimula tayo sa isang pag-uusap. Isang pag-uusap na pumukaw sa isang parte ng aking katawan. Isang parte na patuloy na dinadaluyan ng dugo. Isang parte na patuloy na tumitibok. Isang parte na hindi ko pa alam noon kung anong halaga. Isang parte na sa pagkakatanto ko, sa oras lang na yun tumibok ng mabilis. Naaalala ko ang bawat pangyayari, ang imahe ng iyong muka na tuluyang tumunaw sa aking pagkatao. Naaaninag ko pa ang araw na unti-unting dumadampi sa labi mong kay sarap hagkan. Nararamdaman ko pa ang pagsabog mula sa aking dibdib na unti-unting pinupunit ng masamang nakaraan. Matamis ang bawat pangyayari ngunit paanong humantong tayong dalawa sa ganito? Masyadong mapait. Hindi ko na kayang tikman pa. Minahal kita, ngunit hindi sapat ang pagmamahal na iyon upang manatili ka.
Every period of time
Everything, anything, something, I got nothing.
do not fall in love with me, i will tear you into too many beautiful scattered pieces and you’ll no longer remember who you were and what you’ve been before you met me. you will never remember a part of you that doesn’t have to do anything with me. every part of you consumed my poison, and all there is that will exist in your heart and mind is me, and my love that i lost and took away from you. you will lose yourself. you will breathe my name.
(Source: thediaryofayounglady, via jempsy-deactivated20140212)
"You’re an alien. You’re a monster. You’re an extraterrestrial creature from other galaxy far from Earth." She said.
"Well, you’re scary. You may not be an alien or a monster but you’re the creepiest creature ever created!" I replied.
She looked at me with her eyes burning; Uh-oh! I bet she’s mad. We’ve been fighting here just because of a friend. She’s jealous of Allie, my best friend. I don’t know why. I don’t even like Allie romantically. I’ve been telling that to Sam but she insists not to believe me. I love Samantha, my girlfriend, the one I’m fighting with at this moment. By the way, I’m Chris.
"Oh really? I hate you, Christopher!" She uttered. She uses my whole name when she’s mad.
"I hate you, too, ugly lady!" Okay. I’m being mean again.
"Do you really hate me? She asked.
"No. It’s just that, I’m tired with all of these. I’m tired of fighting with you just because of Allie. Sam, Allie’s just my best friend. You’re the one I love, why can’t you believe that? It hurts whenever I think that you don’t trust me. Don’t you trust me, Sam? Please, let’s stop this. All of the times we spent for fighting could have been spent being happy together. Please Sam, I love you."
"I trust you, Chris. But I’m afraid you might like your best friend. She’s pretty, kind and smart. And you have been best friends for a long time." She told me.
"Sam, I love you. I won’t cheat on you and I won’t do such thing. I’m satisfied with what I have, with what we have."
I held her hands, smiled and hugged her tight. I missed moments when we’re just having fun, doing silly things together, hugging, kissing, holding each others hands. I missed her. I missed us.
"I’m sorry." She said as she sobbed.
"It’s okay, my Queen. Don’t cry, I’m here and I’ll always be here. I love you."
"I love you, too."
She removed her head on my shoulder and asked, “Wait, am I really ugly?”
"No, my Queen. You are the most beautiful woman in the entire world, universe, galaxy!"
She smiled. I placed my hands on her hips, looked at her eyes deeply, smiled. And without second thoughts, I kissed her.
People keep on saying na mahirap daw kapag LDR. Mahirap agad eh 1 or 2 months palang naman. Mygod. Kung ngayon nahihirapan na kayo, paano pa kaya pag dumating yung time na napagod na kayo sa set up na meron kayo, break agad? Lagi kasing iniisip yung negative side. Kung nahihirapan ngayon, hindi nyo na kakayanin yung mas malalang pwedeng dumating sa relationship nyo in the future. Mahirap man yan o hindi, basta mahal nyo isa’t isa, napapadali lahat ng bagay. It’s all about waiting. You should learn how to wait for the time when you could spend the rest of your lives together. Just saying.
I was half a year old when my dad left me. I was with my mother, crying out loud. She carried me with her tears continuously flowing from her eyes. I was so innocent back then, all I feel is that I’m safe with her, with my mom.
I was two when my stepfather started hurting me, he would pat my arms, shoulders and body whenever I did something wrong. He would pull me to the bathroom and lock me inside. I was there, crying the whole time, asking for help.
I was five when I started working, I would get sampaguita flowers and sell it to the mad streets of Quezon City. People buy my flowers not because they need one, but because they think I’m too young to work. Some pitied me, some hated. Sometimes, rich people would buy all of my flowers and give some extra money for food. But most of the times, people would push me away along the sides of the buildings.
I was nine when my stepfather started putting me inside of a sack, he would tie me on a tree, continuously beating me using his leather belt. He would hang me there the whole night and I would cry a river over my stay there. The next day, I would find myself filled with bruises, scars and fresh wounds.
I was twelve when my stepfather started using my body, he would chase me, tie my hands and continue to penetrate my soul. I was so afraid whenever he would touch any part of my body. My mother can’t do anything about it, she’s afraid of him. Sometimes, my stepfather would send me to night clubs and sell my flesh to earn money. I never wanted to do that, but I have to.
I was fifteen when I got pregnant. I never expected that to happen. I still continue working though I bear a child inside my womb. I would sell different things on sides of the market; sitting on the ground. I delivered my child nine months after, but I’d have to give her away; she needs someone who can watch her grow and support her daily needs.
I was seventeen. Alone. Broke, Unsuccessful. I never had a happy and complete family, never given the chance to do what I wanted, never loved, never felt being loved, never experienced happiness, never had a fruitful life. Tired and worthless, I died…
You were there,
but you didn’t
You were there,
but you didn’t
I was there and
all I notice
I was there and
Suggest some books?
OMG! Thanks for asking! These are my favorite books:
- Para Kay B
- Dead is.. Book series
- Dragon’s Bait
- The Mortal Instruments Series
- Finish This Book
- All Alone In The Universe
And these are some books that caught my attention, I’ll buy them after finishing the book I’m currently reading:
- Between The Lines
- My Life As A Book
- Dork Diaries Series
- White Is For Witching
- Benny And Shrimp
- Sexual Healing
Effort ang binuhos mo,
Effort na hinahanap
Effort na kulang
nalang ay tilian
ng mga kababaihan.
sa isang relasyon.
Effort na binibigay
sa mahahalagang tao.
Effort na mahirap
ibigay sa kahit na
Effort na nagpapaikot
sa mundo ng
Effort yun, tangina-
All I’m trying to say is that,
I love you and I care for you.
I don’t care about what other people say,
and I won’t care, anyway.
I’m here and I’ll always be here for you.
Call me stupid
but I’m not gonna stop giving you all of my love,
I’m not giving up, I’m not leaving.
I’m offering you my life, my mind, my soul,
let all of me fit broken pieces of yours.
I’m never gonna give you up.